Practice makes Perfect?

I am not a natural...

I have a lot of fear and self-doubt.

I censor myself and think too much.

i hold back.

thinking too much

I have to practice and repeat things over and over.

And my memory isn’t too hot.

But the enjoyment I get from it and the

feeling that I get from playing music,  writing songs

and performing them...

 makes it all worthwhile.

The Ukettes

Sometimes you just have to conquer the fear and

dive in head first.  You get people who are telling 

you that your crap...but you just have to carry on

anyhow.

Playing with good friends, the ones that support you

and believe in you and help you on your path makes

things less painful.      

 

and when the party is over and 

another year is upon is...

it’s back to the practice room with

new ideas, bigger plans and setting my mind

to be more focused, more accommodating and

forgiving of myself for not being perfect..I’ll
never be that.  I’ll never be famous or fabulous.
I’m

just trying to be authentic to who I am and
finding my own voice.


NO ONE IS GOOD BY IMITATION...

Fab neighborhood Party ringing in 2011

Thank you Mauna & Lee...

I don’t have the voice of an angel.

I sure wish I did but it’s very ordinary...

but I do love to sing and I love to play,

and I know that by doing it I can overcome alot of

other stuff that is standing in my way.


So in this New Year...

I want to conquer all that stuff and I want
to do it just for me...and not to please others.
and stop worrying about what they think about me.


Because the only thing worse than failing
is never trying at all...

1/1/11

HAPPY MOO YEAR...

do your best.

Admit your mistakes.

support one another (we are all in this together)

don’t judge

or criticize

cast away anger and resentments.

quit complaining

soften your heart

move on

wishing you all a year of delight and discovery.

dreams give birth to reality, so dream big...

Wings to Fly

How will I change things?

                                          

I am sometimes a shadow of myself

and afraid to let myself soar... 

 Will I fly away like a bird  so high  above..

because flying away is a great way to escape all those

negative feelings and I can think of many ways to fly

away...I’m good at that.

all art work by Giuesppe de Piero

The holidays always make me feel so blue,  so lonely, so adrift...Families gather, but
mine is faraway in miles and in my heart, and it feels as if it is about to explode into a million
fragments...my emotions are on the surface and the ones that are buried or that I thought were
buried come forth with a vengeance.  And I feel as fragile as a tiny hummingbird with broken
wing gasping for its last breath while it lays in the palm of my hand...



But then a new year approaches...and my thoughts change to how can I make things better..

            

On coming to a close of the year 2010, I pause and look at me and what I’ve become...I have
changed...I am different and I like it.   It’s taken me long enough but I think that at last I can say
“I love you” and mean it.  And although there are many things that I could change and possibly should
change in my personality, there are loads of things I like too...and these are the very things I plan on
focusing on in this new year that is approaching.    I want to be honest and open...kinder and gentler...
quieter...eliminate false fears, don’t let negative thinking cloud my vision,  work for things I want and
naysayers be damned...Shedding old skin is good...healing, cleansing, rejuvenating...still authentic but  not being afraid to show who I am, warts and all.   Watch me cry...see me laugh...let me put my foot in my mouth one more time.  And when I do make a bad, let me learn from it and not instead isolate in my
shell smouldering with anger or hurt and pain.     I can’t change just to please you,  but I might change to please myself.

Christmas Eve 2010

WISHING YOU ALL A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS...

A BREAK IN THE RAIN...


         AND A FEW PHOTOS OF MY CAMILLIAS

         
AND A CHANCE TO SAY THANK YOU, TO ALL OF YOU, FOR GIVING ME SO MUCH
THIS PAST YEAR.    THE GIFT OF LEARNING MORE ABOUT MYSELF AND PASSING 
ON SO MUCH INSPIRATION... 

                        


THE RAIN HAS STOPPED FOR NOW AND THE CRYSTALS IN MY WINDOWS ARE CASTING
RAINBOWS THROUGHOUT  THE HOUSE...AND THE SKY IS A BEAUTIFUL, CLEAR BLUE...
for now...   LOOKS LIKE MORE RAIN HEADED OUR WAY


THIS WILL BE A STELLAR YEAR FOR THE POPPIES, THE PERSIMMONS AND THE LITTLE
APPLE TREES.   


                          

JUST TRYING TO STAY DRY!!!

The rain has hit Southern California with a vengence!    One day there is not enough rain and we
are in the middle of a drought and next thing you know we are experiencing torrential downpours
for 4 non-stop days with more in sight.  Princess and Ginger and I are lucky
enough to be able to stay home with a fire a blazing.  Poor Mr.Beatnheart is out there
working and driving the 50 mile round trip to his shop in Los Angeles.



This is like real winter!              and boy we are not used to it!       and we’re all getting kinda grouchy..

Ginger lookin kinda grouchy...

                                    
                         LIFE IS SWEET AND I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR A WARM,DRY HOUSE,
and without any doubt the fireplace in my bedroom.  I hope all of you are having
a safe and sane week without too much stress and worry.      Cynthia


  






DON’T FORGET...I’M CLOSING DOWN THE BOUTIQUE...SOME THINGS ARE STILL AVAILABLE SO DON’T HESITATE TO EMAIL ME !  

My First Apple Crop...

SOMETIMES IT’S THE SIMPLE THINGS IN LIFE
THAT MAKE YOU SMILE OR CLAP YOUR
HANDS TOGETHER LIKE A LITTLE CHILD.




Today, on this rainy, cold, California day
we picked our first crop of apples from our
tiny, gallon container, Granny Smith apple tree.


Tonight, we’ll celebrate 
with a bottle of
Trader Joe’s Finest Red
a wedge of French Brie
and a fresh Baguette...


and call it dinner.




Because it’s the little things.


the breaking of bread


the laughter of friends


or a tiny seed that becomes a tree
that produces such beautiful, edible things
that sustain and nurture us.


HOW WILL YOU CELEBRATE TODAY?

Hot, Sexy, Men!

Naaaaa....Shameless, Self Promotion!

oh, I’m bad...

but I think you get my sense of humor...

I still have a few of these available...

so check out the Boutique...cause these

are the last days and I’m closing the shop...

and moving on to new and better things.

well that’s the plan anyhow..

 So get gifts from the (Beatn)heart...

Or shop from your favorite Etsy dealers...

Many are on my sidebar...

support these talented shop keepers/ artists 

and buy your gifts from us little guys.

Peace, Love and Prosperity to Us All..

Warm Wishes,   Cynthia